Rattlesnakes...I promise you will get a giggle!

Let me start my story with giving you some background. Missouri has 5 venomous snakes. One being the oh so scary RATTLESNAKE. I personally hate snakes. I don't care if it is a rattlesnake, copperhead, black snake or even a little old garden snake. I can't stand them. I freak completely out and often have nightmares if I see one, even if it's only on TV. I have been known to make someone look under the vehicle before I will get out to make sure the one we ran over miles and miles back did not somehow crawl under the vehicle, sitting in wait for me to get out so it can strike. Or I've refused to put my feet in the floorboard on a dark night because I think it might have somehow crawled into the vehicle and is curled up at my feet. The best might be turning the covers all the way back on the bed to make sure the evil devils are not sleeping in my bed!

Why I have such a fear or hatred for them I have no idea. I don't recall anything tragic happening to me as a child. I don't recall anything tragic happening to anyone else I know either. I do, however, recall as a child my dad would mow the lawn all the way down to the end of the road with a pistol. Every so often you would hear a shot. Copperheads, that's what was common around our house growing up. We learned at a young age to stay away from piles....any type of piles whether it be wood, junk, leaves or just stuff that has been stacked away for storage. You also learned to stay away from damp, dark places. For instance the space that leads under decks or crawl spaces, wood pallets that you stack the hay on in the barn, or even the hay itself!

You can now conclude I did a pretty good job staying away from snakes growing up despite the fact I was outside all the time. We even went to a conservation area in Southwest Missouri called Mark Twain National Forest about every weekend. Our family grew up riding motorcycles and just outside of the little town of Chadwick is a perfect place to take your family. There is a trail down and as a child it was narrow (very narrow) and would wind around the Ozark Mountainside. You didn't have much room for error as one side of the trail was the wall and the other was a long drop off. Not too far into the trail you would come to a little bridge and to the one side was a cave in the middle of the rock wall. It was called Rattlesnake Cave. I never had the nerve to get up there but some of the boys would climb up there. We had heard stories of rattlesnakes being in there but I'll have to ask, I don't remember them ever seeing any while I was around.

There is also a place we would ride dirt bikes and four wheelers in Oklahoma, called Wynoka. Every year they have what they call a Rattlesnake Roundup. I've never been....on purpose, but I've heard stories about them being as long as a truck. If this is true, I have no idea, nor do I want to find out. But the point is I've been many places where I could have easily come in contact with a snake, and if I were going to it would most likely be a copperhead or rattlesnake.

Bringing you to current times my dad passed away in 2003. I acquired a few of his possessions, one being a rattlesnake on a rock. NO, it's not real. I've asked myself a few times why in the world I would get or even keep such a thing when I can't stand snakes. The answer is....I have no idea. I'm still trying to figure it out. I assume it's only because it was my dad's and I want to keep something he had. I guess it's a question for a psychiatrist! Anyway, I've kept this thing and always displayed it in my house. When I first got it I had it sitting in a bookshelf as you walked in my house. It has scared a few people and to be completely honest, it's scared me more than once! As I've moved from place to place this thing has moved with me. I've always tried to take good care as to not break it. You see, it is hard to explain but it sits on a rock but sort of winds up in a striking position which makes it very fragile.

A few years ago our family moved into a house just outside of Springfield, MO. My husband has a gun cabinet and I had it sitting on the top of the gun cabinet. Over the next 2 years the snake sort of got pushed to the back as I piled things I didn't want the kids to touch up there as well. A few months ago my husband was sitting in my office chair which was right next to the gun cabinet putting his boots on and very calm he says, “get the broom, there’s a snake up there”. I, forgetting it’s up there, FREAK OUT. I yell at the kids to get out of the house. I scoot them out the front door and get the broom. I throw it at him and take off out the door. About 45 seconds later I peek my head in the door to find him sitting there as still as can be. I was like, what are you doing, get it!!!! He is quietly telling me he can’t because it’s going to jump on him and I was supposed to whack it, not throw the broom. So we start arguing about how I’m leaving him in there and I’m trying to explain how scared I am and that there is NO WAY I could help because I’m too freaked out. I even start crying because I don’t know how we will get it out of the house. He then decides we need the gun….YES…he’s going to shoot it off the top of the gun cabinet! WHAT? Actually, I was OK with this idea except for the fact I would have to go close to him to give him the gun. So that plan is out and we are arguing again about how much help I am. All the while I’m screaming at my kids to stay out of the house because they keep trying to sneak in under me through the door to see what’s going on. Finally Rod takes this GIANT leap across the living room then sneaks back to get the broom. He stands there a second then whacks the snake with the broom. Then stares for what seems like a year…..Then flips this hat out of the way with the broom. I’m freaking out screaming, “where is it, where is it”…..He stops, looks at me and says, “You did that on purpose”…... “You put that there to scare me”….I’m still confused and go see the head of the snake barely hanging and realize it’s Dad’s snake!

He still won’t believe me that I didn’t do it on purpose.....

This was around Sept 5, 2012. At the end of September and only like 3 weeks after this happened we moved to Northern MO. When we move, of course the snake went with us. We did not have much room in this new place so the snake got to stay out in the shed. I only went in the shed a few times and EVERY SINGLE time that darn snake would get me. I would see him sitting on the shelf and it would take a few moments to realize it was him. We ended up moving from that house about 2 months later. And again he went with us. Now I don't remember packing him up so I'm not sure if I did this or if Rod did but we've been in our new house about a week. I was in the garage trying to find a lost pair of keys and I opened up a cooler sitting by the door. Why would my keys be in there? I have no idea but all the normal places didn't seem to house my keys. So as I opened the cooler I jumped back and screamed so loud I bet the neighbors thought the 12 O'clock siren was going off. There was that freakin' snake......He got me good this time!

My poor poor snake now has a broken head......

 

 

C~C